That feeling of disquiet at the pit of my stomach

So, one more visit to HR. Makes you feel like the floor of your stomach has given way and there is a large vacuum now where your stomach used to be. That doesn't even begin to describe how I am feeling right now. Sometimes I think,"Why do I put myself through this? Is all the money I am earning really worth this daily torture that I am going through?" The answer that comes out is,"I don't know! Maybe it is the wont of every fresher to struggle like this before he finds ultimately what he is looking for. A job that he enjoys. Or is there no such thing? Is 'fun-job' a paradox in itself? These are the questions that one keeps wanting answers to. But, I guess these questions will be answered only through experience, right in the end, when there would not be any use for the answers and I would throw them away like a housewife gives away old junk. Or maybe, I can sell them! Like the housewife does! Yeah, maybe I could then take these answers, make them into a book / training programme / website and earn money out of it!

But, we digress. In the end I think what they say is true. Numerous elders have been consulted, books have been read and conversations have been held. They all say the same thing,"One should enjoy whatever work one gets." But, you know what? Over here, even that is not possible. Because there is no work to do! "So what?", people say. "Enjoy doing nothing! Put in your mandatory hours and then be off to do what your heart pines for... After all, you are living in a place which people die to go visit! And, a few months ago, even you wanted to visit this place. And now that you're there, you are crying that you don't enjoy it."

So yeah, I could go on and on and on like this and still not find a satisfying answer. So, its best to stop! But its good to blog. Blogging is such a big release! There's something about writing it all down that makes the bottomless pit go away. And yeah, I know I should be grateful to have a job in such bad times and all that. So, guess for now the plan is to stick to this job and keep looking whether there is something out there that is exciting enough and pays money to match the current job. Amen to that! Hope we get through to better jobs!

A day in the life of......who else? Me....

So well, another day today. Came to work, made a presentation, met a minister.... Yeah! Today we met a minister! Imagine! We were at the residence of the Home Minister of one of India's western states. So, yeah meeting a Minister, going to his place, speaking to him, shaking hands with him, you'd think its not so big. And you're right. It isn't. It was a HUGE letdown! Its like meeting any other person, only you don't understand what this one is mumbling (hehe..)

And yeah, did I tell you what I did yesterday? I had my extremely belated birthday party at this cool place in town. Well, yeah, it set us back a bit (actually, quite a lot) in terms of money, but it was good fun.

Musings for the day: Sometimes I think, why do people work? To earn a living, right? But why should one earn a living? Is money necessary beyond a point? Shouldn't we all just go back to depending on our parents? Well, yeah, I know what you'll say. Another rich spoilt kid. Yeah, so? I don't care what you think. All I know is that I'm not one of those rich spoilt kids and I still feel that way. Wonder what the really rich spoilt kids would be feeling when thrown into the real world. Maybe they would be coping better. Because, unlike middle-class kids (like moi), they wouldn't have delusions of being able to handle the big bad world on their own...

Hello Blog!

So, here I am, blogging for the first time. I have been postponing this since a long, long time. People tell me I should've started this a century ago. But, what is the point of starting something that you cannnot maintain? Or continuously update? But then, I figured, that blogging would be a release. An outlet for whatever is happening to me presented to this wide-open cyberworld to satisfy their urge for easy voyeuristic pleasures.

Remember how when we were kids, our English teacher used to tell us to maintain a daily diary? Did you ever get down to actually doing that? I always wanted to, but never did. Maybe this is a way to do that. Only difference is that it is for an audience.

Anyways, enough for the first post. Hope this blog prospers, flourishes and makes me a world-renowned writer one day! Amen to that!